Fri{YAY} Favorites: Bride Brain is Real!!!

Happy Friday Y'all 

it was to cute not to post. This is what the girls look like when we say "potty" or "walk"

Let me start off by saying I am a terrible at being a blogger and bride at the same time and I am sorry blogs have been so little. I have had so many planned and then just fall asleep in front of my computer, who knew planning a "small" wedding could be so damn exhausting! 

Any who on to my favorites for this week 

1. We are officially one month from getting married!!!!!! We still have so much to do, mainly getting our marriage license which is kinda the most important thing that has yet to be done.

I'm trying my hardest to not go into panic mode thinking of all the little things that we need to do (or at least that I think we need to do.  J has been good about keeping my wine glass full while I am working on all the stuff at night. 

2. My pretty new desk that I work on wedding and blog stuff every night. Its from Walmart of all place, J went in for football gloves for our nephew and also came out with this.

Its simple and sweet and helps fill a small empty area, this is not out picture this is from Walmarts website. Its great, I loves having a desk to work at. Its not permanent the one we really love is a bit more than our budget allows right now with the whole wedding planning thing. But if you are looking for a good size desk at a great price this one is perfect! 

3. Blaming everything on Bride Brain. Its like pregnancy brain, but for brides, its real goggle it. I am spacey and panicky enough. If you are not sure what Bride Brian is here is what I found on Urbandictionay.com 

             Bride Brain 

 A less invasive, but more expensive version of a frontal lobotomy. Experienced by most brides, as they enter a catatonic state which renders them incapable of sustaining any thought or conversation that does not involve cake, caterers, flowers, wedding dress designers, Chinese wedding dress knockoff designers, updo's, hair pieces, color schemes, wedding themes, and personalized M&M's.

 

Okay so that is sorta it. Basically not being able to focus on anything else but the wedding, how hot your groom is, how sparkly you nre wedding band will make your engagement ring etc. 

So instead of saying it was a blonde moment, I blame bride brain!!

 

 4. NEW JOB!!!! I started my new job this week, and it is very nice to say that I like my job, I like the people I work with, I can hold a conversation with the people I work it. It is a small Doctors office where they focus on Stem Cell Procedures, so I am constantly learning new things and talking to people around the county and even the world about what our Dr. could possibly do for them.

 

Oh and I get to wear scrubs every day... aka my second pair of pjs.

 

5. Last but not least J, my future hubby is  a big favorite this week. I mean he is always my favorite but this week has been a difficult one. My anxiety has been really high because of a new pay structure, wedding budget and money in general which he likes to remind me I always stress about when there really isn't a problem and we will make it work. He is an amazing man and always strives to take care of me and works so hard to provide for us. I am so lucky to call J all mine forever.. haha He is stuck with me!!! 

When this goes up I will be in Orlando for my Bridal shower and at Epcot eating and drinking my way around the world for their Flower and Garden Festival!!

I hope everyone had a wonderfull week and has an even better weekend. The weather is going to be great here in Florida again... Fingers crossed I can get a tan started at some point! 

   

What I Could Never Put In Words...

What my anxiety feels like. 

***warning it about to get real, not a fun upbeat post. Feel free to skip over this post***

I couldn't explain it because I wasn't sure what was going on at first. I was crying and getting hot and short of breath and I thought it was just because I was a little overwhelmed at work.
Then it started happening more, the smallest things would set me off. Stress is something I have always struggled with, stress over money, relationships, etc. you named it probably stressed about it. 

I started thinking maybe its not stress maybe its something more, but I could never put into words what was actually going on. Before I found my little slice of the interweb to share J & I's adventures and struggles I wrote down everything in an email draft not so I can look back at them and bring it on again but to get out what I was feeling at the time and try to make it stop... it never worked. 

Some of the things I wrote were like 
"Trying to just breathe. Just breathe. Just Breathe. That's what I keep telling myself at the moment."
or this one when I started to realize it was much more than stress
"Days like this just make me want to crawl back and bed in forget it happened. Its not anything that happens at work and I don't feel like I have control over it it just all comes on rushing in like a tidal wave. Its an overwhelming feeling and I don't know how to shake it. I get sick to my stomach, short of breath, eye well up with tears and I get massive headaches that I try to blame on my sinuses"

Then this week one of my favorite YouTubers posted a video that explains it all. I can not thank her enough for saying what other couldn't for helping me explain what I going through to my mom and J. 

Almost 100% of what she said in the short video is something I feel/have felt or a mindless twitch I'v noticed while trying to calm myself down. You don't really expect a girl(or guy) with a bubbly personality, ability to make people laugh and just always seem happy to suffer from the mental/emotional/physical pain of anxiety. 


Here is a link to Meghan Rienks channel for more videos to cheer you up after this post. Oh and the cooking tutorials so funny and her most recent money bread one.... Holy Deliciousness!